Party Ends

Stop! Look and listen! It’s time to strap on your best cardigan and prepare to break in the Highball dancefloor properly. Mark your calendars for September 14th for STAY LOOSE: an indie-pop dance party!

Belle & Sebastian frontman Stuart Murdoch’s new feature film GOD HELP THE GIRL is playing at the Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar in Austin starting 9/12 (tickets on sale 9/8)  and we’re bringing you a safe place to meet with other B&S fans and celebrate the very genre that they have been at the top of for almost 20 years. Sure, the emotional, orchestral songs that make you sway back and forth gently are great and all, but let’s focus on the true shakers from the Glasgow blokes and bloke-ettes along with all the other indie-pop bands you know and love to create a magical and FREE evening.

Belle & Sebastian has come to mean an awful lot to people and sadly, they rarely make an appearance in Austin, so this dance party is the going to be THE place to absorb GOD HELP THE GIRL, pontificate on the best Camera Obscura album and to impersonate Murdoch’s gleeful on-stage gyrations in front of strangers. Who knows- maybe you’ll fall in love?!

Self-proclaimed Belle & Sebastian superfan DJ GrossYall (that’s me) will be selecting the playlist and singing along all night long. With The Smiths, Jens Lekman and all your favorite B&S songs- you’d be a cuckoo to miss it!  There’s a facebook thing for it HERE.

STAY LOOSE!

This Tuesday, August 12th, rip your heart out and break it in two to the saddest pop tunes of all time at the latest installment of NO DANCING: Sad Bastard Music. Yes, the saddest, bastardest night of music in the whole country is back with cheap drinks to drown the sorrows and free Kleenex to dry the tears.

Join in at the VOLSTEAD LOUNGE for a low key, FREE evening of likes of the Mountain Goats, Belle & Sebastian, Patsy Cline, Vashti Bunyan, Songs: Ohia, Mineral, Merle Haggard, Ben Folds Five and on and on and on.

The sadder the song, the better the song- that’s been the motto for over a year now at NO DANCING!  Get in on it.  There is a facebook invite HERE.

It’s Sad.  It’s Rad.  It’s rad and sad radandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsadadandsad

Celebrate the ONE-year anniversary of the best sad bastard music night in the country with tunes, plenty of free Kleenex and special guest Chris Simpson!

Yup.  Austin is celebrating the one-year of DJ GrossYall’s (pssst- that’s me…) monthly night of the saddest possible pop songs that prompt profound introspection opposed to booty shaking dancing. The past year has showcased the deepest cuts of music’s misery and lonesomeness spanning from songs of cheating, murder, destitution, and general heartbreak. Typical sets include Loretta Lynn, Nina Simone, Mountain Goats, Ray Price, Smokey Robison, Roy Orbison, Angel Olsen, Hank Williams, Liz Phair, Merle Haggard, Belle & Sebastian and on and on and on. To help mark the momentous occasion, Chris Simpson (MINERAL, THE GLORIA RECORD, ZOOKEEPER) will be taking over the decks from 11-12. What an honor!

The one-year anniversary party will feature free commemorative Kleenex Go Packs, booze specials, and plenty of somebody done somebody wrong songs. The sadder the song, the better the song- that’s been the motto for a year now at NO DANCING!

Odds and ends:

A HUGGING BOOTH!

$1 Drink Specials from 10-11

Chris Simpson from MINERAL, THE GLORIA RECORD, ZOOKEEPER!

And MORE!

SHOUT OUT to the GREAT LUTHER HIMES on the poster!

The weather is starting to get hotter, folks are getting sunburns and more and more “summer jam” nominees are hitting the airwaves, SO it’s more important now than ever to keep the cherished sad sack anthems close to the heart. ENTER NO DANCING! We can’t let songs sung by ex-Disney stars take over the cultural paradigm, we must pray to the alter of Elliott Smith, The Gloria Record, George Jones and the rest at the Volstead once a month.

Join me Tuesday May 13th 2014 from 10-2 for a FREE evening of songs detailing regrettable yesterdays, long gone lonesome blues, and waking up alone. The Volstead bartenders will be slinging the cheapest and BEST whiskey dranks on the Eastside and as always there is a fresh pack of Kleenex (real-deal name brand, mind you) in front of the turntables.

Together, as a people, we can defeat Pink and Imagine Dragons. NO DANCING : Sad Bastard Music for May!

Tell your social networks that your going with this handy Facebook invite thingy.

Image is of George Jones in a totally balla Nudie Suit.

DEATH WOLF!!

March 6th, 2014

Craft beer and booty bass are two concepts I can really get behind. Enter the new jam: DEATH WOLF!

This is the single from Miami ba$$ gods Death Jam Posse that was put out by Fort Lauderdale’s hippest jerk-free craft beer bar Laser Wolf. Not settling for any basic release the record comes in a wooden box that has glowing red LED wolf eyes and from I can gather online- has blood (?) dripped on the 7inch sleeve. WHAT?!

Then there’s the video in all of it’s silly white boy 2-live crewness with the Death Jammers partying Spring Breakers style with wolfmen, donks, and a plethora of basssss. Yes, your new fav filthy bro-rappers with the best new rapper names are Mister Belvedere, Young Lauderdale and Da Swap Shop Kid! I want a Death Jam satin jacket so bad!

1/3 or Death Jam is named Young Lauderdale who also goes by the alias Bleubird and he’ll be playing all over the place at SXSW. CATCH HIM.   Hopefully someday Death Jam proper can come to Austin and carry the Miami booty torch to a bunch of Texans.  LOOK OUT! All hail Death Jam.

Announcing DRE DAY Austin!

February 15th, 2014

Step on up and mark your calendars to take part in a multi-city day-party in honor of the good Doctor.

This is the 12th year that Dre Day has been formally celebrated across the world and this year’s Austin installment will be truly be a worthy celebration of one of hip hop’s brightest stars. We’ve got a major lineup of some of the best DJs in the city cutting up all of Dr. Dre’s biggest hits and samples spanning his 25+ year career, from World Class Wrecking Cru to N.W.A. to Snoop Dogg to Eminem to 50 Cent to Xzibit to Kendrick Lamar and beyond! Check it out on the facebooks HERE.

Featuring DJ sets from:

G.W.A (Gingas With Attitude = Bird Peterson & Kid Slyce)

DJ Miss Manners

DJ GrossYall


Live performances from:

P-Tek performing as Eminem

and more!


G-THANGS:

Chronic Photobooth!

Lowriders!

FREE Dre Day stickers

Genius Gin and Juice Specials!

40 oz Koozies!

And a BLAZE MACHINE that must be seen to be believed!

Shout out to:

Holy Mountain

PartyEnds.com

Hip Hop Hooray

Genius Gin

And the doggfather of the whole thang: Burlesque of North America!

Remember kids, when you diss Dre, you diss yoself.

The Valentines installment of No Dancing: Sad Bastard Music is soon. It will cause your eyes to water and hearts to break. Together we’ll be plumbing into abyss of the loneliness and betrayal and little heart shaped candies. NO DANCING reminds us that the best songs are the saddest ones and that whiskey tastes best when The Magnetic Fields are involved.

Come out to the Volstead Feb 11th to take part !  Here is a facebook thingy for it!

Also- I’ve started a monthly column over at Side One Track One that features musical mp3 mixes that are nice and depressing. Pretty neato!  For installment number one, I started with the Man In Black and ended with later day Chubby Checker from his lesser known 1971 psychedelic record Chequered which is a giant leap from his well known Twist steez. Along the way there is some of Blake Schwarzenbach’s softer side from his JTB moniker, Boston’s Modern Lover and 1 of the great 69 love songs. Sprinkled in is my favorite Cat Power song lately and a holiday song from Tom Waits that is ideal to cringe in it’s tragedy any ol’ time of the year. Snag all these great sad bastard toonz over at Side One Track One.

“Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands, of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?” – Rob Gordon//High Fidelity

Preach it brother Rob!!!

So, this is the New Year. Come ring it in together PROPERLY with the saddest possible pop songs on Tuesday the 14th at the Volstead for another installment of NO DANCING: Sad Bastard Music.  It’s FREEEEEeeeeeeEE!

While we kick off 2014, I’d like to thank everyone who has supported the monthly NO DANCING nights thus far and made it the nation’s leading night of sad bastard music. It’s been fun to get together once a month and interact with other people that like Neutral Milk Hotel, bitterness, Hank Williams and misery all alike. With your help each month, a few miserable emotions have been dealt with musically and at least 100 cubic feet of whiskey has been consumed- that’s a true victory!

Some highlights from December’s installment included: Loretta Lynn, Nina Simone, Mountain Goats, Ray Price, Roy Orbison, and heck there was even a Get Up Kids song.

Join in on introspection Tuesday at the Volstead to grab a nice cocktail, or a shot and beer with your friends and rest assured that no popular dubstep songs will be played.

I bet it’s fine to go ahead post this self-indulgent list even though most “legitimate” websites did this actually IN 2013. Right?  Yeah, totally. I saw 326 movies last year and 130 of them were released in 2013. The others were mostly from the 80s.  Here are my mega-favorites.

1) SPRING BREAKERS

I walked out of the theater in March with a big dumb grin on my face and said to myself that is the movie of the year.

The movie left folks feeling dirty thanks largely in part to the gun-sucking, the manicpanic ski masks/bikinis and generally everything about James Franco. I loved it and I should note that I’m not one of those ‘Harmony Korine types’ by nature. I’m the type of guy that gets a big kick out of the idea of Disney-loving teenagers (and maybe even their parents) going to see this movie thinking it’s something that it is very much not. This uncomfortable-to-the-point-of-hilarious movie was totally my favorite thing I saw in 2013. Word on the street is that the sequel will be 48fps and in Imax. Fingers crossed!  Spring Break FOREVER!

2) HER

This movie is too perfect and too close to me to talk about here because I had a thing with an operating system for a while.

3) THIS IS THE END

This movie is meta as shit and features a completely crazytown apocalypse premise, synchronized boy band dancing, masturbation jokes and Kenny “Fucking” Powers doing that thing where he makes a bird out of his hands soaring over a spread of breakfast treats. There are problems for sure with this movie, but kudos on bros in charge for getting a studio to pay them to have such a blast of a good time.  Also- note the magical Cera windbreaker.

4) THE WORLD’S END

I’m a sucker for Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost and also a sucker for beer drinking, aliens and inside-jokes. Let’s all get together at the pub and watch SHAUN OF THE DEAD, HOT FUZZ and THE WORLD’S END back to back! Oh- and let’s drink a keg of lager also.

5) AINT THEM BODIES SAINTS

Mmmmm acting, I love me some good acting. Rooney Mara and Casey Affleck in the magic hour light of 1970’s Texas is a beautiful thing. The movie is full of beautiful things left and right- especially the sound design featuring the funky organic group handclapping! This blood-soaked, dirt-clad  movie has love, guns and even has Skinny Pete from BREAKING BAD! It’s a gorgeous Texas punch in the face!

6) BLUE JASMINE

Mmmmm acting, I love me some good acting. Cate Blanchett turns the acting party OUT in the new Woody Allen movie and along with the rest of the cast makes alcoholism and depression COOL again! Her performance alone rightfully slaps this movie on the list and cleanses the Woody palate after TO ROME WITH LOVE.

7) IN A WORLD

I’m a giant CHILDRENS HOSPITAL fan and writer, director, and star Lake Bell called in some awesome favors for her debut movie from her role on the Adult Swim show to recruit amazing performances from Ken Marino and Rob Corddry in the indie comedy about voiceover acting that the world didn’t know that it needed. The movie is way more about rad women stuff than those two cool dudes in a refreshing, Bechdel Test-passing way .  IN A WORLD is funny, it’s emotional and brought me the magical phrase that I’ve used over and over again this year: “sister code.”

8 ) ONLY GOD FORGIVES

Nicolas Winding Refn and a near silent Ryan Gosling got back together for knifey violence, bizarre mother tension and psychological drama all draped in Bangkok neon lights. Oh- and there’s karaoke!I would very much like to watch this movie again in 2014.

9) FRANCES HA

Clumsy Greta Gerwig! Twenty-something friendships! Black and white New York! This movie resonated with audiences who know these types of people and who are these people in a way that other movies just don’t. Sure, there are movies made with young folks all the time that are meant to appeal to “hipsters” who like “mumblecore” or whatever but they don’t pull off the joyous aimlessness and insecurity of FRANCES HA. Greta Gerwig is just a pleasure to see go through the drudgery of trying to make sense of life in the big city while being “undatable.”

10) ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES

There is one scene where Kristen Wiig asks Steve Carrell if he wants to the see the face that she makes “when she sees a snake made out of candy” and that is the absurdly fun scene I’ve been talking about non-stop since. It will likely be something silly I talk about and impersonate until the next inevitable ANCHORMAN.

depressing december

December 2nd, 2013

No dancing and no presents.

Don’t let the big man in the red suit tell you that you have to be happy this month. It’s cold out and apparently we are supposed to be full of cheer. Humbug! Instead of slaving away at a mall, let’s get together and listen to recordings of the saddest pop songs the cruel world has ever produced at NO DANCING: Sad Bastard Music December 10th. Oh, and drink booze. There is a facebook invite HERE.

Expect plenty of the saddest seasonal toonz along with plenty of songs that have noting to do with jingling bells. Rock out and drink up along with the Volstead crew who pour gallons of (discounted) whiskey to drown the sorrows. Come catch up with your friends in low places! The FREE event is from 10-2am and will get you thru the post-Thanksgiving/ pre-December holiday depression.

Here is one of my all time favorite sad songs from the seminal Vandals records Christmas with the Vandals. The disheartening minor key string arrangement is enough to bring you to your knees but then you have the hopeless, lonesome lyrics. And the droney outro of nothingness! SO GOOD! This is next level seasonal affective disorder.

“Christmas is hell on earth, I know nothing worst/ then being depressed and told to be happy./ The season of su-icide, I know why they died/ Christmas reminds me I have nothing”

MP3: THE VANDALS- Hang Myself From the Tree

For over a decade this cd stays in my car all of December and I play the absolute BEST steeringwheel drums. I know in my heart of hears that it would make Josh Freese proud.

Don’t forget to “like” NO DANCING on the facebooks HERE! Austin- see you on the 10th!

Need a last minute Halloween costume idea to wear to the spooky/ironic/scary party? We’ve got you covered.  Dress as my favorite Saddle Creek recording artist of all time – Tim Kasher! You’ll need these 7 easy things:

1) Speak the whole party nostalgically for memories of love gone wrong.

2) A shaggy Hair wig.  But not toooo shaggy.

3) Have a heightened sense of self-awareness.

4) Have a heightened fear of death, loneliness and general pathos. Also be sure to cite the irony of making a living from it (see above self-awareness).

5) A bottle of whiskey.  Note: this should not be prop booze. It should be real.

6) Have a knowledge of Omaha’s chief exports (hint : it’s agricultural commodities)

7) Go topless and uncomfortably cover yourself in Vaseline and dirt.

The Good Life / Cursive/ solo artist is gracing the inside stage of Red 7 with his tragic presence Saturday night and PartyEnds is partnering with Transmission to give away a pair of guest list passes! Email PartyEnds@Gmail.com with your favorite Kasher-Related song in the subject line and a winner will be drawn randomly and notified Friday at 4pm. Please include your full name in the email.

Not feeling lucky punk? Grab your tickets in advance of the show for just $10 HERE.

The last time Kasher came thru town on the Game of Monogamy tour (one of the best sad bastard albums of all time) he played the inside stage at Mohawk and treated the crowd to versions of The Good Life and Cursive songs which made the packed room of fans’ hearts collectively break. His music has also been a mainstay of the monthly NO DANCING party at the Volstead so the poetic angst lives on in Austin there and I know many are looking forward to Truly Freaking Out upon his return to Austin this Saturday.

Laura Stevenson and the Awkward Robot open.

Time flies when you’re listening to Beck’s Sea Change on repeat. It’s time for another installment of the monthly FREE sad bastard music night NO DANCING: Sad Bastard Music. East Austin’s Volstead Lounge will once again turn over its sound system to the most miserable music bearable in public and pour the stiffest drinks possible Tuesday October 8th 2013 from 10pm-2am. CHECK OUT THE FACEBOOK INVITE HERE!

Come drown your sorrows and catch up with your friends in low places.

Drake!

Cat Power!

Neil Young!

(Smog)!

The Good Life!

Angelo Badalamenti!

Buck Owens!

Dottie West!

Jimmie Rodgers!

Sufjan Stevens!

Mineral!

MORE MORE MORE CRY CRY CRY !

(image credit)

Hyperactive, hypersilly, hyperhypo suspastar rapper Bleubird (AKA Young Lauderdale from Death Jam!) has just graced the internet with the Black Skinhead remix that we all needed but MAYBE didn’t know that we needed. And it’s totally “ill.” The track from Kanye’s latest Yeezus has been retooled, re-rapped and re-dubbed White Panther and is FREE for your downloading pleasure. Bleubird is a menace of the microphone and is devoted to bringing smiles to all the little children and kitties of the world. And you know it, and you know it. Check out the song and download it for free BY CLICKING ON THIS LINK RIGHT HERE! !

*******************************

In other innovative indie-hip hop news to be aware of if in the general Austin vicinity: the MOHAWK is playing host to WHY? and Astronautalis Sept 27th and it will be nothing short of magical. Get your tickets HERE.    The Astro record This Is Our Science has been out for about 2 years now and is more better than ever right about now.  If you don’t have that record yet, there’s so much we can’t talk about together!

(Image from Vinyl Passion)

piano hits

September 19th, 2013

Here’s a quick definition on the goofy yet grave named Marijuana Deathsquads for the uninitiated: Marijuana Deathsquads is the ever-evolving, “electronic-hardcore” endeavor fronted by Ryan Olson, (POLIÇA and GAYNGS), Isaac Gale, and Minneapolis’ golden son Stefon Alexander AKA- P.O.S! Their whole deal involves a stable of percussionists and a slew of weirdo electronic instruments all mutating around for improvised musical rad togetherness. As if the Doomtree collective wasn’t enough of a illustrious collaborative undertaking to make outsiders (me) question their own accomplishments in life, Marijuana Deathsquads are making us all look bad for being so damn good… despite the questionable name.

The group has released a remix album of the P.O.S neo-classic We Don’t Even Live Here and their rework of the track Piano Hits is extra tasty.

Check it out below! For FREE! THANKS THE INTERNET!

I’m excited to see Marijuana Deathsquads live in Austin at Red 7 October 18th for the first time open for the all-mighty and always good P.O.S for the fifth time. This will be a wonderful evening of rappiness.  Tickets are on sale now HERE.

******

Happy #FANTASTICFEST everyone lucky enough to be attending in Austin.  Play lots of games at Fantastic Arcade and be sure to see the movie COHERENCE.  It’s incredible… like PRIMER incredible.

orange is the new rap

September 17th, 2013

“This is not just another story about the failure of America’s drug war, this is a call for help to friends, fans or anyone else who cares.”

Ceschi Ramos, the founder and showrunner of one of the best outlets for indie/innovative Hip Hop Fake Four Inc, has been put in the slammer and that is a drag no matter how you cut it. Fake Four has given the world releases by Astronautalis, Bleubird, Busdriver, Dark Time Sunshine, Sole and more. Fake Four is the little Connecticut record label that could and I want to root for it’s ongoing success.

I don’t know all the details of the complicated-sounding story, but as you can see from the video below that there is a grass roots campaign happening to keep Fake Four up and running while Ceschi is serving his plea bargain sentence to nobly keep his family out of the slammer. UPDATE: FULL RUN DOWN OF ALL OF THE HORRIBLE SOUNDING DETAILS OF THE WEIRDO FRAMED SANTA STORY HERE)

There is a successful indie-go-go donation campaign happening that brings joy to my heart to see that hip hoppers care and take care for their own. It’s not for legal fees, it’s to keep the indie rap machine turning turning. All of the perks are desirable, but I especially like what you get for $344 – you can make a song with Bleubird!  Imagine how fun it’ll be to google search cat videos with him during downtime!   Check out all the pledge rewards and see what you can earn yourself HERE.

Ceschi: I’m not sure what the internet situation is in there- but stay strong and know that you’ve got a lot of pals and fans.  And if you’re reading this, and need to be cheered up- you can always watch Lookin’ Kitty.

#FreeCeschi

Not sure when the last time you cried at a bar into a stiff drink was, but it’s time you do it again! The monthly down in the dumps party NO DANCING: Sad Bastard Music is back at the Volstead Tuesday September 17th. It’s totally FREE and features an awful lot of low-priced/high-quality whisky drinks to help you better understand what it was Nick Drake was really trying to say.

The evening will be full of nothing but the absolute saddest songs about love tearing things apart, regret, and tracks that could have been included in the Blue Valentine soundtrack.  Invite your friends and come get lonely!  Tell your social media buddies about the show on the facebook HERE!

I kept a rough/drunken approximation of what all was played at August’s installment.  If you like the looks of the below as far as tunes to drink to go, then come out to the September show for a whole new mix of misery! Check it out:

The Summer Ends – American Football
Red Apple Falls- Smog
No Dancing- Smog
Some Sad Country Song….
This Diamond Ring- Gary Lewis & The Playboys
Harper Valley PTA – Jeannie C. Riley
Instant Death- Beastie Boys
There Goes Everything- Jack Greene
Wild Is The Wind- Cat Power
Borrowed Tune-Neil Young
The End Of The World- Skeeter Davis
In A Radio Song- Okkervil River
Some Names Will Never Die- Astronautalis
Gigolos Get Lonely Too- Morris Day And The Time
Lord I Feel Like Going Home- Charlie Rich
Strange Fruit- Billie Holiday
Butterfly- Weezer
Smog- Strayed
Paranoid Android- Brad Mehldau
Neil Young- Oh Lonesome Me
Crazy Mary- Pearl Jam
Don’t You Ever Get Tired Of Hurting Me- Ray Price
Gods Gonna Cut You Down- Johnny Cash
To Protect The Family Name- Pedro The Lion
Love Is A Loosing Fame – Amy Winehouse
Tell Laura I Love Her- Ray Peterson
He Cried- The Shangralais
Success- Loretta Lynn
The Ascent Of Stan- Ben Folds
Your Cheating Heart- Hank Williams
Some sad Leonard Nimoy song.
some illegible weepy song….
All Thoughts Are Prey To Some Beast- Bill Callahan
Immaculate Heart 2. American Analog Set
Sometimes- Sunny Day Real Estate
Bridge Over Troubled Water- Willie Nelson
Girl From North Country – Dear Nora
a heart wrenching Magnetic Fields tune
Sound Of Silence – Simon And Garfunkle (And Me)
Ohio- Crosby, Steels, Nash and Young
One of those whiny Radio Head tracks
Conway Twoitty – Touch The Hand
Patches To Victory- Cat Power
A tune by miss Bessie Smith
Mr Pitiful -Otis Redding-
How Soon Is Now- The Smiths
No Children- Mountain Goats
Love Hurts- Gram Parsons
Shivers- Boys Next Door
Ruby Dont Take Your Love Your Life Town- Kenny Rodgers
Holocaust – Big Star
A Sad Neutral Milk Hotel joint
An Even sadder Ben Folds Five joint
Cat Stevens- The Wind
No Harmony – Tim Kasher
It’s Cool We Can Still Be Friends- Bright Eyes
Bad Days- Okkervil River
Lover I Don’t Have To Have Love- Bright Eyes
2020 Vision – Ronnie Milsap
Don’t Speak- No Doubt
These Eyes- Guess Who
Rilo Kiley- Pictures Of Success
A Girl In Port- Okkervil River
The Band Played Waltzing Matilda- The Pouges
Solitary Man- Neil Diamond

big girl$

August 28th, 2013

The mystery drrrty south Floridians behind the booty bass satire (?) group Death Jam released another internet single called Big Girls, where the song’s protagonists pay homage to those who are big, proud and screaming it loud.

Check out the deep-fried, trippy sprinkled, high-booty-cultured, chocolate-BBQ sauced dripped, 2live crewy music video dedicated to the stylishly curvy and also snag the song for your iTunes for free!

I wonder if this post will get any more hits in this post-Miley VMA world that we live in. Oy vey. If you like this – check out the video for PPP!

MP3: Death Jam- Big Girls

FYI: TLC

August 21st, 2013

I get a lot of press releases promoting new releases from independent bands who are hoping that a blog will love them and they’ll become the next Clap Your Hands and Say Yeah-circa 2005. Sometimes the press releases are about upcoming tours that are coming thru Austin in hopes that the millions of readers of this blog will all buy tickets and pack the venue out and buy all the t shirts. I recently I got a heads up that 90’s supastars TLC are setting up a tour and had some spare dates and were accepting offers to help flush out their tour dates and of course I wanted to take out a loan and see if they’d come hang out with me in East Austin. Maybe Chilli and T-Boz would want to hit up Kebabalicious or something.

The comeback tour that I never knew I wanted is going to happen. But wait! Who will be performing Lisa “Left Eye” Lopez’s trademark verses? I emailed back to find out the answer to this crucial question and found out that the other two would be doing her verses and that specifically a hologram version of Left Eye would NOT be involved in the tour.

The notion of Nicki Minaj filling in wasn’t specifically confirmed or denied so I’m going to just assume that is what will happen.  SO – be on the look out for a hologramless TLC coming to a town near you soon!

Hopefully the Fun Fun Fun Fest bros got the same email and can squeeze them in on the Yellow Stage.

sad bastards unite

August 20th, 2013

NO DANCING! America’s best* sad music night is back at the Volstead! I will try to break your heart with songs of misery, cheerlessness and general apathy! What a great Tuesday night activity! The bartenders will expertly pour anything you black heart desires to heighten your ability to enjoy Hank Williams, Azure Ray and Cat Power and so on, but whiskey is especially recommended. And we’re in luck- Cutty Sark Scotch is on sale for just $4 or $6 with a beer! No questions asked!

Most of the heartache jams will be played from vinyl, but there are mp3s too in case records frighten/confuse you! Yes, this is the only place in town with countless sad bastard songs about suffering, misfortune and Smokey Robinson’s tears.

Won’t you join in on the depressing fun? Won’t you? You will?! That’s great news!  You should bring your lonely buddies too!  Do it now before that Wal-Mart gets built on East 6th st!

You can check out the Facebook invite thingie HERE and “like” No Dancing on the popular social media website HERE.  You can do it!

* try and prove that it is not.

esme’s got a red 7inch!

August 3rd, 2013

I woke up this morning with The Rolling StonesShe’s a Rainbow stuck in my head on blast. It’s burned there forever after seeing it performed last year at the memorial for my friend and yours, Esme Barrera. The song was infused with a new breath of life by 40 or so ladies most of which were involved with the first-rate non-profit group Girls Rock Camp Austin. There were guitars, glockenspiels, synthesizers, omnichords, tambos, and too many other noisemakers to list making the 1967 Their Satanic Majesties Request standout track somehow absolutely perfect to memorialize a comrade who meant so much to so many people. Now that Fiesta Gardens memory of the gathering of new/old friends, family and people you recognize vaguely from seeing at shows over the years has become tactile with the release of a red vinyl 7inch recording of the song at Spiderhouse Ballroom August 4th.  You can now hold that memory in your hands and spin it 45 times a minute at your house.

The production of the record was crowd funded via indiegogo and more than doubled it’s goal. The release show/ Esme birthday celebration features one of her favorite local bands the Golden Boys, Love Inks, Simple Circuit and MORE. The show is from 4pm-8pm and will likely be bittersweet. But Spiderhouse Ballroom has a full bar so… there’s that.

Proceeds from the door and from the vinyl itself go directly to the Esme Barrera Unlimited Possibilities Scholarship Fund (or the handy acronym : EBUPSF)  The below video is hard for me to revisit because of connotations, but if you’d like to -  go for it!

Take care out there folks and continue the best No Bummer Summer yet.

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